Let’s start from the beginning; if and when a zombie outbreak occurs you need to be properly prepared. This is why I suggest you purchase a few things in advance…just in case. My list of pre-purchases is small because I assume once the outbreak is in full swing the need to purchase anything will have plummeted. The list is as follows:

• A weapon of some sort (should probably be a firearm, but a blade or large blunt object would be acceptable)
• Ammunition (if you did indeed buy a firearm)
• A first aid kit
• Non-perishable food items. (Canned goods are good but if you can get MREs [meals-ready-to-eat] I suggest you get those. Military grade food that lasts a LONG time.)
• Fuel for your vehicle of choice.

Once you’ve made those pre-purchases you should have enough supplies to relocate to a stronger location and make a stand for a while. Alas, unless you live in an abandon military bunker or a castle I suggest you relocate to a larger, more well-supplied location. A prime example would be a shopping mall, a grocery store, convenience store, or somewhere that carries food items. Now depending on the severity of the outbreak you may need to act as a parasite on the land, moving from location to location consuming the available foods.

Without the proper hideout your plans of survival in a zombie-ridden world will be useless.

So having established what you should have already purchased, you should take these goods, secure your residence, and move out. Be sure to seek safe harbor in one of the aforementioned strongholds. Once you have reached a mall or grocery store you should proceed to secure the premises. This is where your weapon you bought comes in handy. Make sure all doors are locked and if they have the metal gate those are drawn down. You may be tempted to keep one open to relieve some stress by shooting zombies but this is a terrible mistake. Just one open door will allow the entire horde of zombies an entry point to your stronghold. If you wish to blow off some steam, do it from the roof.

If you find yourself quickly surrounded by a large group of zombies you should think fast and stay calm. Zombies do not, can not, and will not run so you already have a huge advantage. If you just think on your toes you should be able to avoid serious injury by simply fleeing. Hopefully you’ve been properly trained in identifying zombies and at this point you should know to immediately aim for the skull with intent on destroying the brain. No other means of damage will stop a zombie attack.

You should feel more educated now as to how to handle a zombie outbreak, and will be fully capable of defending yourself and your loved ones in the event of an attack. This multi-part guide will continue later with more pertinent information as to where to defend amongst other topics.

Happy Hunting.

Keep watching for more posts on how to survive!

Let’s go ahead and get the biggest and most glaring problem out of the way. It hurts for some people but you all know it’s true: Zombies do not, cannot, and will not run. Part of the zombie ethos is that a zombie is afflicted by the post-death syndrome of “Rigor-mortis” which Wikipedia defines as such:

Rigor mortis is one of the recognizable signs of death (Latin mors, mortis) that is caused by a chemical change in the muscles after death, causing the limbs of the corpse to become stiff (Latin rigor) and difficult to move or manipulate.

Now, obviously if affected by this, it would be incredibly difficult for a zombie to move at anything faster than a crawl. Ergo, if it runs, it is not a zombie. Ok, let’s let that one simmer. Many people will abandon this article at that point and refuse to acknowledge that a being greater than them dreamed up the perfect monster (George Romero).

Another rule of zombies, they are extremely moronic but NOT unintelligent. In George Romero’s Day of the Dead, scientists were studying a placid zombie named Bubs. He – over time – gained the capacity to understand very simple things. Later in the progression of Romero films, the zombies began to learn that they would not drown, or they can use tools and/or weapons. That being said they never graduated to complex physics or theoretical mathematics but they can do simple things.

Zombies are driven by a hunger for brains. They can smell human flesh and that drives them to a location. Their senses work, and they can hear a human as well as we can, so any sound out of the ordinary would give a person’s position away.

Zombies do not have brute strength because they don’t need it. One of the key things about the zombies is not their ability as a singular zombie, but as a functioning horde. The zombie threat comes from the fact that there is a huge possibility for extreme widespread outbreak. The numbers alone are enough to cause a generous amount of anxiety in any believer. If you attack a tank with one person the tank would win, but if you storm a tank with 1000 people it wouldn’t be long until those people flipped that tank on it’s head.

While I’m trying to clarify what does and does not pass for a zombie, I’m in no way discrediting movies that have “zombie-like” creatures. Some of those movies rank very highly on my favorites list. 28 days later, 28 weeks later, and the Dawn of the Dead remake are some just to name a few.

My goal with this post is simply to clear the air. So next time, when one of your friends comments about a zombie on television you’ll have the knowledge and know-how to check and see if what he/she has seen really is a zombie indeed.

Happy Hunting!